Don’t hire me just because I’m a female.

by Jen Gluckow

Hire me because I can deliver, because I will impact your company, because Im smart, because I can get the job done, because I am the best possible person for the job.

I got a call from a speakers bureau saying, Were looking for a female speaker. Seriously? Do you ever hear people say, Were looking for a male speaker? If they did, they would have females whining about it for days. It would go viral.

There are now speaker bureaus that will only accept females. Ugh. While I appreciate the equality effort, if there was a male-only speaker bureau, ladies would be up in arms, picketing, marching, and name calling.

Yes, I acknowledge there are gender inequalities in the workplace, inequality in pay, and there are some great people doing great work to try and fix that, but the greatest work of all needs to be done by each and every female who is working. Earning equality not whining for entitlement. Ladies, its time to step up and work your ass off.

Heres a reality: Ive heard many men say that they would rather hire females, that females make better salespeople, that females make better managers.

Heres a question: So why are there so few females at the top?

Well, Im not qualified to answer that question, but I did work my way up to a senior position and can tell you what works. I can tell you how I got there, and what my mindset was. Hopefully, this will help you too, rise to the top (whether youre male or female).

You can have your cake and eat it too. Consider the irony: Ladies want a man to open the car door (and believe me, I get it, I love experiencing male chivalry), but then we get upset if they have to open the door in business. Females, start opening your own door. Hail your own taxi. I promise, its liberating.

Here are 13 ways to open your own door:

Take the chip off your shoulder. The world will treat you as you treat the world.
Dont look for a lawsuit, but do stand up for yourself. No one has the right to be mean, harass, or be abusive to you but you dont need a lawyer to defend you. Stand up for yourself. Make your mom (and dad) proud.
Get there early and stay late. Set the standard for yourself to be the best possible employee. When they see youre there first and stay to the last, youll earn the one thing in the workplace needed to succeed: RESPECT.
Work your butt off all the time youre there. This includes taking on extra responsibility before youre given it (hint: be a leader). Take on the role you wish you had and prove that you can do it, and then ask for more money once youre already doing it.
Set your pay mindset to positive: Were all humans with a choice to be happy or angry. Male, female, whatever. Take on the mindset that you will be paid based on skill and ability. Focus on your sales mindset – you sell more, you make more or your work mindset – you produce more, faster, better, you get paid more. If you focus on what others are getting paid, youre not focusing on the job you need to do. Whats more important? Your actions are a direct reflection of your attitude and your mindset. Theyre a self-fulfilling prophecy. Heres the formula: Have a great mindset and you will do great work (growth and promotion will follow).
Surround yourself by successful, supportive people. Happy, supportive, non-judgmental people.

PERSONAL STORY: When I was graduating University and looking for a job, I had three requirements: I wanted to work for smart and supportive people where the potential to grow was limitless. I was working with a recruiter who thought I was brilliant or nuts (or maybe both!) he had never had this kind of request or search before. Because of past experience and a history of promotions/growth, I knew I could grow if given the opportunity to prove myself.

Confidence and belief in yourself first. Believe in yourself FIRST. If you dont believe in you, why should your colleagues or your boss? Your emails, your words, your communication needs to contain confident language because its reflective of your personality and persona.
Leave personal drama at the door. Whether youre male or female, blue or purple, youve come to work to WORK, not to stress about your personal life, other peoples drama, or gossip about the night before.

PERSONAL STORY: After a bad breakup, I once showed up to work wearing two different shoes with two very different heel heights. My balance felt off all day, but I just attributed it to the breakup. Meanwhile, I got ALL of my work done and focused in on what I needed to do. At the end of the day, my boss called me into his office. He asked if everything was ok and I smiled and said, Yes! He looked down at my shoes for a few seconds (hinting everything was not okay) and thats when I realized I had two different shoes on. I had made it through 8 hours not realizing it because I was so focused on work. Sometimes rules need to be broken I decided to break my own rule based on the context of our working relationship. We had worked together for a few years, and had established a friendly rapport. I let him know about the breakup, but that I was alright. He told me if it werent for the shoes and my all day funny walk, he wouldnt have had any idea – he was impressed by my work ethic – for showing up with a smile and ready to work. A few weeks later I got the promotion I had been working towards. Coincidence?

You dont ask, you dont get. A famous quote said repeatedly by my mother. Feel you deserve a higher salary? Ask for it (you better have reasons why). Whats the worst they can say? Ask for the raise, ask for more responsibility, ask your boss with confidence just like you would ask your customer for the sale.
Manage up. Make sure your boss knows how invaluable you are by providing monthly updates on your accomplishments. Aligning on future goals and demonstrating achievement.
Welcome feedback. Dont take it personally. Handle feedback and criticism with a grain of salt. Take it constructively, and use it to become better. If someone is taking the time to offer feedback, appreciate it.
Dress for the job you want. Yes, appearance matters. If you look like a slob, male or female, no one is going to take you seriously – I mean, why should they? You dont take yourself seriously.
Have fun. Work should be fun. If youre not having fun, youre doing something wrong, or youre in the wrong place.

ONE MORE STORY: A friend told me that her heavyset co-worker was upset her ideas werent taken seriously while my (skinny and attractive) friends ideas were. There was an assumption that because my friend was good looking, her ideas were being heard more. Truth is, she just had better ideas. MORAL: Look your best, but dont assume that will get you heard. In addition, you need to think your best and work your best and youll have the best ideas that will be heard/implemented.

Inequality exists, but if you dont let it affect you or your attitude, then it wont. Turn your perception into reality, and concentrate on being your best.

Inequality exists, but if you dont let it affect you or your attitude, then it wont.
Concentrate on being your best.#JeninaNYminute

Dont get into a gender bender. When I started my first job after University, I encountered a challenger. For some reason, (I have no idea what the reason, nor do I care), this senior level executive was dismissive of my ideas, downright rude, and condescending. Perhaps it was gender, or age, or who knows what. I made it my mantra to kill him with intelligence (not kindness because if youre too kind in NY, youll be eaten alive). In four weeks, I won over his mind and gained his respect. It took time, patience and extra energy on my end, but the end result was priceless. He started coming to me asking for my advice!

I have 3 words for catty/angry women: get over yourself. Six more words for everyone: Do your best at all times.